Totally Made-up Gay Award: Bill Clinton's Wife Honoured

US Secretary of State Hillary Clinton has won the first-ever Totally Made-up Gay Award, Fagburn can reveal.
The award was invented by Pride London the other day in the vain hope that she'll come over and pick it up.
"This is a prestigious award", a press release commented earlier.
Previous winners of the award include no-one. 
Ms (Mrs?) Clinton was awarded the award mainly because Pride London wanted some publicity.
Last year she gave a speech to a United Nations summit about The Gays which broke the world-record for banal platitudes. 
That's right, just one cruddy speech.
"Gay rights are human rights, and human rights are gay rights," Clinton, 5'7", said, adding; "Rights human gay are, gay human are rights."
In a mortal blow to sexism Pink Paper has listed her sole achievement in life as being "married to former US President Bill Clinton".
The exact number of LGBT people she has killed in Afghanistan, Iraq, Libya and Pakistan is unknown. 
"We really hope this award will inspire the British gay media to reprint our press release," a spokesman for Pride London told Fagburn exclusively via a mass mail-out. 
"Media partners" Gay Star News said; "We obediently reprint any old shit we're sent, so this complete non-event is a gift to brain dead stenographers to power like us."
Hillary Clinton will be honoured at a "star studded gala dinner" at a 5-star hotel in London on July 5th. 
Though this is likely to be downgraded to the Neasden Travelodge closer to the night.
Stars expected to stud the gala may include Christopher Biggins, Beverley Knight and someone from Big Brother 3.
Tickets to see Hillary Clinton not pick-up her award are £250.