"Busty glamour model" Katie Price has been seen canoodling at a Chrimas Party with a bit-part actor who's been in EastEnders three times and has done some soft porn.
Got that?
Fascinating.
Oh, and taking your knickers off in a video isn't quite the same as being a "gay icon", love.
Times like this make me really hope the Mayans were right and the world does end tomorrow.
PS Louis Smith - of Olympics and strictly fame - is also labouring under the misapprehension that he's a "gay icon" - which has clearly become a thoroughly meaningless term.
Whoever next?
Keith Harris? Orville? Clarkson?!!
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