Thought For The Day: David Sedaris

For the first 18 years we were together, I'd give Hugh chocolates for Valentine's Day, and he'd give me a carton of cigarettes. Both of us got exactly what we wanted, and it couldn't have been easier. Then I quit smoking and decided that in place of cigarettes I needed, say, an 18th-century scientific model of the human throat. It was life-size, about 4in long, and, because it was old, handmade, and designed to be taken apart for study, it cost quite a bit of money. "When did Valentine's Day turn into this?" Hugh asked when I told him that he had to buy it for me.
What could I say? Like everything else, holiday gifts escalate. The presents get better and better until one year you decide you don't need anything else and start making donations to animal shelters. Even if you hate dogs and cats, they're somehow always the ones who benefit. "Eventually we'll celebrate by spaying a few dozen kittens," I said, "but until that day comes, I want that throat."

The Observer Magazine.
From an extract from David's new book, Let's Explore Diabetes With Owls, published Monday week.
By serendipity, BBC Radio 4 Extra are tonight repeating the episode of Meet David Sedaris where he reads this essay in a high-pitched voice. 
Oh, and there's also a rather sweet interview in today's Sunday Times.*

Nutters love him. They are forever engaging him in inappropriate conversations about sex or throwing hissy fits on aeroplanes. “I think it’s that I’m not threatening in any way,” he says. “Also, I have this ex who had sex with so many people when we were together because he never took his ‘open’ sign down.” Sedaris reckons he has his own version. “My ‘open’ sign says, ‘Got something f***ed-up to say?’” He laughs. “‘Open 24 hours!’” 

PS Here's a short promo video for the book - how modern!

* The Sunday Times have filed Sedaris under 'Books/Fiction', which may be libellous. Your local library should be able to give you a code to get behind the Murdoch paywall.