The Sun: Fantasy Island

DAVID Walliams’ marriage split was fuelled by his wife hating his TV cross-dressing, pals said yesterday.

His camp public persona — including flirting with Simon Cowell on Britain’s Got Talent — also left model Lara Stone, 31, miffed.

A friend told The Sun after we yesterday revealed the Dutch beauty had quit the marital home: “She didn’t really understand the humour of it.

“There were obviously lots of issues within their relationship.

“But it had become clear Lara didn’t like the constant talk about David being camp.

“She got tired of it being referenced all the time, especially when David seemed to play up to it in various photoshoots or TV sketches — or by flirting with Simon Cowell...

This is credited to unreliable, grinning gay fool Dan Wooton in The Sun - and from an anonymous source (ie one of his underlings probably made it up).

You can get away with nonsense like this as it's not worth suing over.

Thought For The Day: David Walliams

I think it’s all about falling in love with the person and that is overlooked, really. I hate it when people ‘confess’ or ‘reveal’ their sexuality and also things can change for people over the years.

So it is about the person but I also think it goes beyond that. You don’t just fall in love with someone’s body, do you? You fall in love with someone’s soul and heart and brain.

David Walliams interviewed in Radio Times.

Maybe Fagburn's problem has been falling in love with people's bodies, rather than the other stuff...

The Daily Star heads their story; David Walliams: I Do Wish Gay Stars Wouldn't Come Out, which isn't what he meant at all. 

He surely means the opposite, that it shouldn't be shameful or a secret.

And he's not blaming people in the closet, but a culture that creates this.

Is anyone so silly that they think Walliams - of all people - thinks people shouldn't talk about their sexuality?

In one of many interviews where he talks about his own sexuality?

Well, apart from Pink News readers, obvs. 

PS Whatever happened to that little bald guy he used to work with?

PPS Oh, and yes, today there is now gayder news...

Update: After talking to people on Twitter, yes, I could have got this hopelessly wrong and maybe Walliams is being a dick (and a hypocrite), and if not, yes, it could have been worded better.

Comic Relief: A National Joke

Cause gay marriage - like fellas in dresses - is funny...

Britain's Got Talent: Situation

“Britain’s Got Talent is like a gay sitcom this year. There’s David and Simon who are a couple, then me and Amanda Holden who are TV wives. That’s exactly what it is.

“So much is said that is too risky for the main show, especially from David. It is such a shame we don’t do a BGT out-takes show that goes out after the watershed.

“The tone has got lower and lower this year thanks to David."

Alesha Dixon quoted in the Daily Star Sunday - so bum knows if she really said it. 

PS The Star also tells us David Walliams is "flamboyant", yet "married". Thanks for that...

PPS On reflection, I'm not sure why I posted this, it's pretty boring, isn't it?

David Walliams: Not Gay

"I've always been camp. A lot of people can't make the distinction between someone who's camp and someone who's gay.
"It's a thing people really fear in themselves and I think everyone who's homophobic probably has gay thoughts and feelings."

Esquire.

1. No they don't.
2. No they don't.

David Walliams: Notes On Camp

“Once you become well known and a certain national daily newspaper has a gay-o-meter — naming no names! — people have a sense of what you’ve been up to.
“Not necessarily what you’re thinking or feeling, but actually your childhood, your early life, your passage to success is generally something that they're going to know nothing about. I wanted to concentrate on that period.
“I know there is fascination with me because I'm camp, yet over the years I’ve been connected to some very beautiful women.
“I’ve married a supermodel yet there I am on Britain’s Got Talent with Simon Cowell, camping it up.”
And referring to experiences as a teen he added: “I guess I’m just very honest about my sexuality.
“I had gay experiences as a child and remember being very confused about that.”
He continued: “I think there will still be people who will want it out of me, until the day I die.
“But I’m glad I talked honestly about my childhood sexual awakening because I think there’s plenty of other people out there who will be reading it and say, ‘That’s quite normal, that happened to me. It confused me too.’
“I’ve always been effeminate, and I think people confuse effeminacy with homosexuality, like they go hand-in-hand.
“But there are plenty of effeminate people who are straight, and plenty of butch people who are gay.
“I’ve always been camp, I’ve always been drawn to playing Wonder Woman in the school playground. I’m not worried about it, it just seems other people are."

David Walliams in The Sun.
His autobiography, Camp David, has a brilliant title, which may be baffling to anyone under 40 who doesn't know about the Camp David Middle East peace talks (Camp David's also, hilariously, in Maryland).

PS Walliam's first book - for children - The Boy In The Dress is beautiful, go read it.

James Bond: Ah, Mr Moneypenny...

One of James Bond’s biggest fans, David Walliams, revealed a conversation he had with producer Barbara Broccoli when guesting on the One Show yesterday:
“I did ask her to be Moneypenny. I said: if M is a woman, why can’t Moneypenny be a man, and have a crush on James Bond? But she just laughed, and not in a good way.”

Via Unreality TV.
Shame. Sounds so very different to Sebastian Love in Little Britain... 

Walliams & Cowell: A Fine Bromance

'MATT Lucas has branded his comedy partner David Walliams and Simon Cowell the “new Hinge & Bracket”.
'Little Britain star Matt said David and Simon are getting so pally on Britain’s Got Talent that they remind him of the old telly drag queens.
'On the left [^] is how David and Simon would look as the couple who used to sing – and bicker – around a piano.'

The Sun.
Oh dear...

The Daily Star adds informatively...

'BRITAIN’S Got Talent stars Simon Cowell and David Walliams are to carry on camping it up to beat The Voice.

'Telly focus groups have revealed that viewers of the ITV1 show are loving the antics between David Walliams, 40, and Simon Cowell, 52.

'They told chiefs they want to see the camp Little Britain actor tease and flirt with the music executive even more.

'A show source said: “David has been given the green light to ramp up his bromance with Simon for the live shows.

'“Producers believe it’s the key to hooking in more viewers. The focus groups said they’re loving the show’s talent but wanted even more of David and Simon.

'“Viewers enjoy seeing him leave Simon speechless and red-faced. It’s going to become the campest show on telly."

'Last weekend new BBC1 show The Voice averaged 9.5million viewers, pipping Britain’s Got Talent, now in its sixth series, with 9.1m.

'Cowell admitted he was “irritated” to come in second best.

'Wild comic Walliams, 40, married to model Lara Stone, 28, repeatedly jokes on the show that he has a crush on bachelor Cowell.

'He also teases the music mogul about his sexuality, calling him “Queen Simon”.

'Cowell has admitted he is fond of his new judging pal, saying: “It was meant to be, wasn’t it? You know the sketch with the Prime Minister and the gay assistant in Little Britain, it’s like that.”

'Cheeky Walliams then added: “Except you’re the gay one.”'

Fagburn, for one, is positively gripped.
Many people on the Twittersphere have been asking about Will.i.am on their rival show, The Voice, incidentally...

PS The general consensus on Matt Lucas's new show, The Matt Lucas Awards, which debuted last night, is that it is absolute ruggish and painfully unfunny. Oh dear...

David Walliams: Bum

David tweeted this photo, and captioned it; "Me and my boyfriend."
Which led to this story in The Sun; "David Walliams: Fans always ask me if Simon likes men or laydees - BGT judge gives bum steer on Simon Cowell's sexuality."
Bum! Geddit?
David later tweeted; "Today's completely made up BGT story comes from The Sun."
But sadly about a different story.

David Walliams: Wild About Harry

Channel Four could be found to have breached broadcasting rules over an obscene joke made on one of its shows by David Walliams, the comedian.
Appearing on Chris Moyles' Quiz Night, the Little Britain star told the Radio 1 DJ that he would like to perform a sexual act on a teenage member of the boy band One Direction.
Ofcom, the media watchdog, is now assessing whether the show broke strict rules governing the use of offensive language amid growing concerns about declining standards on television.
The watchdog and Channel Four have both received complaints, and campaigners described the lewd joke made by the children's' author as "disgusting" and "appalling".

The Daily Telegraph.

Walliams said Harry Styles was his favourite member of One Direction adding; "I'd like to suck his dick."
Amazingly the Mail hasn't express their outrage about this (yet), maybe Walliams should repeat it on the BBC?

Come Fly With Me: Plane Crash TV

Reviews of Matt Lucas and David Walliams' Come Fly With Me have been predictably stinking.
Though pointing out that the targets for their comedy are often society's victims now seems as tired and predictable as... well, as an episode of Little Britain Abroad.
In fact Come Fly With Me has a broad speculum of comic characters, from Fearghal (pictured), a campy gay air steward on a budget airline, to Moses, a campy gay "executive passenger liason officer".
Verily, as Matt Lucas has said; "All human life is there."
Currently halfway through its first series arguably Come Fly With Me's main problem is that it's just not very funny.
However The Sun today have managed to find someone to defend the show;
"David and Matt's new series is absolutely brilliant and very funny.
"I don't believe for one minute they have a racist bone in their bodies.
"They are falling victim to political correctness - just as I did. And political correctness is killing comedy."
Who be this?
None other than right-wing comedy legend and wifebeater, Jim Davidson.
Nick nick!

Comedy Double Acts: Strange Bedfellows

"Double acts have almost always had two performers of the same gender, usually male, with the most famous female one, French and Saunders, still following the model of chums with a big/little, small/tall contrast. One reason could be that audiences seem to prefer double acts to be friends or enemies (bickering is part of the shtick), without any sexual tension. Morecambe and Wise famously shared a bed in their domestic sketches, as Laurel and Hardy had before them, with the joke depending on the asexuality of this arrangement, although biographies have revealed that Morecambe expressed concerns at being thought homosexual.
"This tension has been interestingly explored in recent duos where one of the performers is gay. Stephen Fry told me that he had never felt any flicker of sexual interest in Hugh Laurie, and was relieved by this, because he felt their partnership might otherwise have collapsed. For a while, Walliams's status seemed ambiguous, meaning it was conceivable that he and Lucas could become an item. Walliams now has a wife, though – so again we have a contrast, a difference, helping to give the double act its power."

Marl Lawson explores the dynamics of comedy double acts in his Guardian column.
If Mr Lawson wasn't so tragically fugly Fagburn would ask him to marry me.

Daily Mail: Matt Lucas - An Apology

An article (March 1) ‘How Matt Lucas learned to laugh again’ caused great upset to Mr Lucas which we did not intend and regret.
The article on Mr Lucas’ return to public life following the tragic death of Kevin McGee suggested he had ignored Kevin’s calls, became a virtual recluse, and hosted a birthday party to ‘move on’.
We accept this was not the case and apologise to Mr Lucas.
From The Daily Mail today.

This isn't much of an apology - barely 70 words long, it's hidden away on page 20, a left-hand page.
Matt Lucas was also awarded "substantial" undisclosed damages from the Mail.
He sued for invasion of privacy over an article which appeared in March – five months after the suicide of his former civil partner Kevin McGee.
Matt Lucas said in a statement;
"This has been and continues to be a very difficult time for me and all those who loved Kevin.
"My deep pain and sorrow have been made even greater by the intrusive and defamatory stories made about my private life in the Daily Mail.
"I had no choice but to bring these proceedings to protect my private life and my right to grieve in peace.
"I'd like to add that I take no pleasure or sense of triumph in this settlement. I am just relieved that this case has been resolved and I sincerely hope this sort of intrusive reporting will now end."
One year on from Jan Moir's disgraceful attack on Stephen Gately, The Daily Mail has clearly learned nothing - not even basic tact, or how disgusting it is to dance on a man's fresh grave, even if he's a gay man.
The article has been cached here; 'How Matt Lucas learnt to laugh again; He's lost three stone and still blames himself for his partner's suicide. But now the Little Britain star's stepping back into the limelight.'
Lucas won damages from The Daily Star in May for invasion of privacy over a story they had run following Kevin McGee's suicide.
In 2008 Lucas and David Walliams won damages from the Star after it claimed Little Britain USA had angered an American gay group - which didn't actually exist.

Come Fly With Me: Is It Okay If I Don't?

Can there be a phrase more certain to strike dread into the hearts of all right-thinking people than; "Matt Lucas and David Walliams new series is due to be shown later this year"?
If anyone cares apparently Come Fly With Me is set in an airport and centres around the hilarious comings and goings at a budget airline.
So lots of opportunities for those two overgrown public school boys to sneer at working class people again.
And to poke fun at some gayers too, no doubt - almost certainly trolly dollies.
And as it's at an airport, there can be loads of those funny foreign people!
What larks.
Well probably not - if it's anything like Walliams and Lucas's last few desperate outings, it'll have less laughs than a graveyard.
Johnann Hari wasn't the first to point out that Little Britain was comedy founded on "mocking the weakest people in Britain" in his 2005 Independent article; ''Why I Hate Little Britain'.
But he probably said it best.
"Their targets are almost invariably the easiest, cheapest groups to mock: the disabled, poor, elderly, gay or fat. In one fell swoop, they have demolished protections against mocking the weak that took decades to build up."
Enjoy!