Channel 4: For Nothing

"Their [C4's] ethos had become, 'ratings are the most important thing'. Then we found the pressure was on Brookside. Although we had the Jordache [family] saga and domestic violence, what got us most attention was the lesbian kiss... we fell into the ratings trap."
"In 1982, it was very clear: Channel 4 catered for minorities and it facilitated people's ideas – they were the two key things... 30 years later: what minorities are they catering for and how are they facilitating people's ideas? That's not to say they're not doing good stuff, but they're not actually contributing anything to the social fabric. What are they doing, except just keeping themselves in a job?"

Phil Redmond - Grange Hill, Brookside and Hollyoaks creator - talking to The Independent On Sunday.
What's happened to Channel 4 is a tragedy and a travesty of what it was meant to be.
Remember Out On Tuesday, Red Triangle, Queer As Folk...
Its remit states:

The service remit for Channel 4 is the provision of a broad range of high quality and diverse programming which, in particular:

• demonstrates innovation, experiment and creativity in the form and content of programmes;
• appeals to the tastes and interests of a culturally diverse society;
• makes a significant contribution to meeting the need for the licensed public service channels to include programmes of an educational nature and other programmes of educative value; and
• exhibits a distinctive character.

Today's highlights include Beach Volleyball (Live), endless repeats of ancient US sitcoms, five repeats of Jamie's 15 Minute Meals, a magic show, Deal Or No Deal, American Football Live...

Olympics: Is That It?

Well, if even a miserable old cynic like me enjoyed Danny Boyle's Olympics Opening Ceremony spectacular, it must have had something going for it.
One point though - which I hope doesn't sound too parochial (or like a knee-jerk gay journalist's Dave Spartism).
The ceremony was clearly trying to show what a wonderfully diverse and inclusive place modern Britain has become - particularly the second half.
And it picked as two of a handful of historic moments that made modern Britain, the Suffragettes and Windrush.
So where were we?
It seems incongruous as so much of the soundtrack (Kinks, Queen, Bowie, Frankie...)* hinted at what a queer old place this is.
I may have missed something, but all I saw was a snippet of the "Brookside lesbian kiss".
But this was so brief I doubt hardly anyone would realise what was going on if they didn't know of the fabled "Brookside lesbian kiss". **
[The kissing segment is 1.05 in here. I'd estimate the Brookside bit is two or three seconds long - out of an 80 minute show! If anyone's fast enough to actually time it, please let me know].
There was one other thing, that I'm not too sure about - again it was a blink-and-you'll-miss-it-moment.

As the Queen and James Bond flew over London there was a few fleeting seconds of the scene on the right.
It could just be some men in their best suits drinking Champagne - or is it meant to be a civil partnership?
As with the above was it deliberately brief, and vague - and thus really a quite pointless gesture.
Wouldn't this have been something to go big on, if you wanted to show the world how much this country's changed for the better?

Update: Unfeasibly right-wing Tory MP Aidan Burley calls the ceremony "leftie multicultural crap". Not a patch on Berlin 1936, eh Aidan?

* There was a distant clip of Bowie doing Starman on Top Of The Pops, which you could call a pretty seminal gay moment, but this had no context.

** Postscript: The Guardian online calls the kiss a "Little-noticed 'special statement'" - it's hardly much of a statement if hardly anyone noticed it. I think this was intentional.

TV Kissing Poll: Lesbians Good! Married People Yuk!

YouGov has just published the findings of a poll they conducted in June about how people feel about seeing fellas kissing and a'cuddling on TV and that.
You may recall this was quite a big story back then, mainly because of a MADE-UP STORY in The Daily Mail about a wholly fictional "Lesbian TV Watershed Kiss Ban", Christian and Syed canoodling in Eastenders, and The Bailey Report into "the Commercialisation and Sexualisation of Childhood".
Wisely YouGov also raised that thorny old question as to whether kissing outside marriage is ever okay.
I know what you're thinking - but how does this break down according to party affiliation?
As you can see below Lib Dems are pretty levelheaded about things.
But Tories would rather french kiss their dog's bumhole than see two blokes spooning on the tellybox.

And finally here it is broken down according to age.
Fagburn is colourblind, so may have got this wrong, but among 18-24s it appears lesbian kisses are the most acceptable, and married kisses are the least acceptable.
The world's turned upside down!

Right, I think this has settled the whole gay and lesbian kissing on TV before the watershed thing once and for all, so let us never speak of it again.

Via PoliticsHome.
Don't forget to read the small print.

UPdate: More detailed look at the findings from The Guardian.

EastEnders: The Vortex

"I think EastEnders was the first soap to broadcast a gay kiss about 24, 25 years ago so it's only taken them 25 years to get into the bedroom from the living room... I think that we showed a heterosexual kiss on Monday night between Max and Vanessa that had no complaints, so I think we're right to show a loving, tender relationship within the context of the timeslot... I think Christian and Syed are the most established gay, loving relationship on TV. It wasn't crude, it wasn't over-sexual. It was something that you see every day within a heterosexual relationship and I stand by the decision to do it. [Syed] had just accepted his marriage proposal, so it was a beautiful moment."

Bryan Kirkwood, Executive Producer, Eastenders.
Just to push Fagburn even closer to insanity he was actually discussing this on This Morning this very morning.
Where! Will! This! Media! Vortex! END!!?

• Michael Cashman tweeted today; "25 years ago this month I played EastEnders gay Colin. A first!" (Fagburn thinks "gay Colin" may not have appeared until August 1986. And gay Gordon had come out in Brookside the year before anyway. But let's not split hairs).

Update: The vortex carried on into Thursday's Sun; 'Two in a bed is fine, says Enders chief'
A reader has left the comment;
"to the 125 people that complained you have a button on your remote that you can turn it OFF or turn OVER because the bbc have shown what 2 men in bed dont complain when its 2 women are in bed"
Quite.

The Daily Mail: Loves Lesbians Kissing

"Lesbian kisses could be banned from television screens until late into the night under radical Government plans to stop children being exposed to ‘indecent’ images.
"A review launched with the backing of David Cameron is expected to recommend that sexually suggestive scenes currently allowed before the 9pm watershed – such as the famous lesbian embrace on soap opera Brookside – should not be shown until later in the evening. A ban on explicit advertisements on high street billboards is also being considered.
"The inquiry is being led by Mothers’ Union chief executive Reg Bailey [Sic]..."

As this is in The Daily Mail it is - but of course - accompanied by the shocking photo above of some hot lezzas snogging.
As it's in the Daily Mail and quotes someone from the homophobic Mothers' Union (Who is also clearly not a mother) this story is unsurprisingly utter nonsense.
It's an "independent review" - ie all Reg's own work - and has no government backing.

Update: This story was dutifully reprinted on Advocate.com - fast becoming as shit as our own Pink Paper and Pink News on lifting stories from right-wing homophobic papers without questioning them or bothering to check them. FFS!

Update2: The Sun were also mightily vexed about the sexualisation of popular culture - which they proved by printing six sexy photos including one of two lesbians kissing - Won't somebody please think of the children!

Update3: For more on how nonsensical this story is see Fagburn May 3rd.