British LGBT Awards: Winners & Losers

Christ on a tricycle, where do you even start?

Categories include; Corporate Rising Star, Corporate Straight Ally, Inspirational Role Model, Celebrity Straight Ally, Global Icon and Brand/Marketing Campaign!

Sponsors include the Royal Air Force and the Telegraph!

Their 'main beneficiary' is the Peter Tatchell Foundation - an odd choice as their (his) accounts show they have a substantial cash surplus.

Still, I'm sure Saint Peter will redistribute the money to the needy of the parish.

You may recall the star guest at last year's event was... Katie Hopkins!

And hey, Meet The Judging Panel!

It doesn't tell you how much it costs to book a table, but safe to assume it's several thousands.

To attend a lavish exercise in LGBT utter pointlessness!

Well, obviously it has a point - to make lots of money for Square Peg Media.

PS The Independent reports on people being somewhat flummoxed and/or pissed off by the likes of Zayn and Zoella - whose contribution to gay life is close to fuck-all - being shortlisted... the Z list?

One Direction: Zayn Slams Rumours!

One Direction fans have long fantasised the duo are more than just friends, referring to them as Larry Stylinson.

Recently reports suggested Harry, 21, and Louis, 23, had fallen out and now travel separately.

But ex-Directioner Zayn leapt to their defence.

The Bradford boy, 22, said: “There’s no secret relationships going on with any of the band members.

“They won’t put their arms around each other as they’re conscious of this thing, which is not even true.

"It’s just the way the fans are. They’re so passionate, and once they get their head around an idea, that’s the way it is. If it wasn’t for that passion, like, almost obsession, then we wouldn’t have the success that we had.”

Daily Star. 

 

Erm, he's clearly not SLAMMING the rumours, is he, silly? 

 

Rather, he just sounds rather bored by it all.

 

Here's the gripping Fader interview with some saucy pics!

Zayn: Quits!

But who will now be the token non-white guy on Attitude's annual World's Sexiest Dude list?

PS Mirror Online are currently running 20-30 stories a day about this national tragedy.

Zayn Malik: Welcome To Broken Britain!

Daily Mail.

Fagburn is literally too upset to type.
A line has now been drawn in the sand!
Have we lost our moral compass?
What has become of our troubled youth???
I am literally shaking with rage about this.
But at last we have finally seen the dark side to this so-called 'squeaky clean boy band'.
Well, if this is your country, you are welcome to it.
What next? Free heroin on the NHS?
Daily Mail writers on coke???
I'm going to Spain.
Goodbye!

Your irony cuts no butter here, young lady - Twitter account now suspended!

Zayn, you've let the entire world down...