Ted Heath: Police Wasting Their Own Time

Residents of Wiltshire would be well advised to invest in new safety locks, high-tech alarms and alsatian dogs. Their constables are busy elsewhere.

As The Times discloses today, the county’s finest are going to be occupied for the next year or so working their way through 4,500 crates of the late Edward Heath’s private papers. This will be in an attempt to shed light on sexual offences allegedly committed by the former prime minister. The officers are determined to leave no stone (or piece of paper) unturned. Not only will they be embarking on industrial levels of research in the Bodleian Library, they will also be questioning people who crewed on his yacht, housekeepers, drivers, musicians and political aides.

One by one, claims against Heath have fallen apart as soon as they have been subjected to minimal scrutiny. Other forces have been tugged into this increasingly grotesque case. An allegation that Heath moored Morning Cloud off Jersey to use the yacht to abuse and murder local care home boys was quickly exposed as nonsense. It was a racing vessel that needed a three-man crew and had no private space.

It could of course be that the police have found a credible victim who can give substance to the many extravagant claims. They have, however, made no such public pronouncement. Most of the allegations, notably those stemming from testimony made by the informant “Nick”, seem to be built on foundations of fantasy. Instead the investigation is an opportunity for police grandstanding. Superintendent Sean Memory of Wiltshire police set the tone last year by addressing the public outside Heath’s former home.

Some forces seem to have suspended their power of judgment, such is their fear in the post-Savile era of being accused of a cover-up. It’s time they recovered a sense of proportion.

Times editorial. 

What the fuck is this meant to achieve?

Do you really think he would have donated some secret diaries about child rape and murder to Oxford?

Unfuckingbelievable.

VIP Paedophile Ring: Oops!

A key witness in the VIP paedophile scandal says that he can no longer stand by claims attributed to him that he was a witness to two murders.

The man, known as Darren, told The Times that in dealings with journalists, campaigners, politicians and police over the past two years he had felt under pressure to make allegations and disclose names. He said he wished he had never spoken out about his allegations of child abuse and wanted no further contact with detectives who were still trying to investigate his claims.

Darren said: “I feel like I’ve been used. Making the allegations has destroyed my life and left me vulnerable.”

He was also in email contact with Tom Watson, Labour’s deputy leader, who raised the prospect of a Westminster paedophile ring in the House of Commons in 2012. The Times has seen a message to Darren in which Mr Watson offered to email the Metropolitan police to “chivvy them up a bit” in relation to one investigation...

The Times.

Surely it's time for the hysyterical witchfinder Tom Watson to resign?

Metro: Yes, Thank You

 

Good job the media didn't get hysterical about this...

Jonathan King: The Unspeakable In Pursuit Of The Uneatable

The moment Edward Heath sat down in the first class seat next to me on the flight from Scotland to London, shook my hand and said ‘Jonathan, it is a pleasure to meet you’ I determined to flirt with him in order to find out whether the rumours that he was gay were true...
Spectator. 

Jonathan actually goes on more about his own arrest and imprisonment.

Ted Heath: Did He Kill Cecil - The Cowardly Lion Who Knew Too Much?

Ted Heath: 'A Liar And A Fantasist'

The Independent.

His story had more holes in it than a string-vest! 

Heath never owned a flat in Mayfair for one.

Ted Heath: What Did Maggie Know???

Some believe Ted Heath’s ruthless ambition to become Prime Minister meant that he hid what he considered was his darkest secret.

When his political career started to take off in the 1950s, homosexuality was considered a bar to a seat in Parliament.

The claims were serious enough he apparently had a visit from Special Branch officers who told him that not only was it illegal to go “cottaging” but it would end his career in politics.

The damning accusation of his seedy sex interest did not emerge until 2007, two years after his death, when a fellow Tory publicly “outed” him for the first time.

Brian Coleman, a member of the London Assembly who was then one of the party’s most prominent gay politicians, wrote in the a magazine article that Heath had once been warned in the 1950s by police - who were vetting him for membership of the Privy Council - to stop seeking out gay sex in public places...

So Heath did everything he could to mask his desire for gay sex.

But there were Westminster insiders who believed that there was a more sinister side to his sexuality - a weakness to find boys willing to sell their bodies to wealthy professional men.

One of the strongest rumours was that Heath, while Tory MP for Old Bexley and Sidcup, preyed on vulnerable young men...

Mirror.

One of those days when the media has become so lunatic, I think I'll just go back to bed...

Ted Heath: Good Luck Hunting

This has to be the most bananas story of all time.

Ted Heath: And I'm The Queen Of Romania

We must always believe the 'victim' etc etc.

Like in those Satanic Ritual Abuse cases.

Next week: 'And then I was abducted by aliens'.

Ted Heath: LOL!

Inquiries will focus on whether Wilts police acted improperly when a probe said to involve the politician was dropped in the ’90s. They will establish whether a case against a woman accused of running a brothel was dropped when she made claims about Heath.

But investigators will also seek to unearth the truth about rumours that bachelor Heath committed underage sex offences.

Heath, a classical music buff, was Conservative Party leader between 1965 and 1975. He moved to a home near Salisbury Cathedral, Wilts, in 1985 and lived there until his death.

The police spokesman, outside his former home, said: “We would like to hear from anyone who has any relevant information that may assist us in our inquiries or anyone who bel-ieves they may have been a victim.”

Heath’s sexuality was shrouded in mystery. He never married and was presumed to be a closet homosexual or asexual by many who knew him.

He entertained gay pals at his home in his twilight years and spent the months before his death attended by a young man.

In 2007, Brian Coleman, a gay ex-Tory member of the London Assembly, alleged police knew Heath was “cottaging” in public toilets with young men in the 1950s. He claimed officers warned Heath to stop seeking out anonymous sex partners to save his career.

Coleman said gays “ran” the Tory Party in London for years, suggesting Heath may have been protected. Since Heath’s death, rumours have spread he targeted underage boys.

Claims have come to the attention of authorities on Jersey, where wealthy Heath often docked his yacht Morning Cloud. Like Heath, Savile was a regular visitor to the Channel Island, where the Haut de la Garenne children’s home was said to have supplied victims to sex fiends. Campaigner Carrie Modral, of the Jersey Care Leavers Association, said of Heath: “It’s said that boys would be taken from the home to parties on his yacht.” ...

The Sun.

I know it's the 'silly season', but even I have my limits.

Ted Heath: Probe

The Sun.

Oh please, everyone knows the old queen was stitched up like the proverbial teddy bear.*

The thought of him suddenly getting it on in his 70s is pretty ridiculous.

The case was probably not pursued as it was as daft as Basil Brush.

* Not sure what proverb this is, may have invented it.

Ted Heath: A Bit Stiff

They do say that if you want to keep a secret you should make a speech in the Commons chamber or publish your autobiography. One such memoir dropped through my letterbox years ago: columnists are deluged with unsolicited books. During a major sift through the accumulating heap to see what could go to the charity shop, my hand hovered recently over No Make-Up: Straight Tales from a Queer Life, by Jeremy Norman (2006). Idly I flicked the pages.

It’s a marvellous book. Startlingly candid, unblushingly funny about wealth, privilege and the pursuit of fun, Mr Norman (for ten years a proprietor of Burke’s Peerage and the founder of the Heaven gay nightclub in London) paints an unforgettable picture of gay life in an age of official prohibition.

But it’s his description of Ted Heath that surprises. In a spiky miscellany of vignettes of exotic gay and bisexual men, spies and hedonists, appears a chapter on the late Sir Edward. Norman’s interior-designer partner, Derek Frost, had done work at Ted’s Salisbury house. The former prime minister (says Norman) kept inventing tiny “after-care service” tasks (like re-stitching two cushions) to ask the couple over or get himself invited to their country cottage. “It was clear to us he was lonely, and looking for an excuse to meet, [and that] in his own inhibited way, he was reaching out to us as a gay couple . . .”

Also Private Eye, 1970.

Ted told them he had supported an equal age of consent but “the party rank and file would never have stood for it”. Norman concludes: “I couldn’t help but conclude that he was a deeply closeted gay man . . . That impression was reinforced by his monosyllabic answers to questions about his love life.

“The last time we saw the old boy was [in 2004] when we called on him at Salisbury . . . He was as hospitable as ever. His housekeeper provided some excellent canapés and he opened a bottle of champagne. A curious and unexplained character greeted us at the front door: a young, educated Oriental man who seemed to be a close friend and confidant. He was clearly not an employee, as he stayed with us during our chat . . . No explanation was sought or proffered as to his place in the household.”

Gossip is not always unkind. Like Jeremy Norman I think more affectionately of Ted because of these reflections. They humanise, explain his woodenness, and say something about the injustice that left him with a personal side but one he felt he could not speak about.

Matthew Parris in his Times' column.

Not as controversial as Matthew's last prole-hating column on Clacton-On-Sea.

Fagburn: That's Enough Gay Tories!

Fagburn's had enough of writing about gay Tories this month.

Let's just remember the good old days when the Conservative Party was a queen-free zone.

Tory Boyz: History, Boys

The play’s historical sections are hampered by the character of the ambitious young Heath. He proves intractable on stage. An intelligent, laconic, elusive and entirely humourless mummy’s boy, Heath never reveals himself. Nor does the play threaten his defences or present him with choices that would force him to open up. My guess is that Graham has been bewitched by late-vintage Heath, the Incredible Sulk, who glowered like a toad on the green benches for three decades.

But Heath in his heyday was refreshing and approachable. For starters, he was called Ted, like some bloke down the pub. His signature attribute was his bonhomie. Everyone in the country could impersonate him. You just had to roar with laughter and let your shoulders trampoline up and down. Compared with the shifty and neurotic Wilson, he was attractive and colourful (yachtsman, maestro), and he gave the impression of being fun to be around. But in this play Heath shows no trace of psychological complexity. He’s like Billy Bunter impersonating a cagey swat. And the script reaches puzzling conclusions about the evolution of the Tory party. If anything, it seems that life was easier for gay Tories in the past. When the closet was the only place to be, that’s where the shrewd politician stayed. And Heath had plenty of time to rehearse credible answers to tricky questions. As I recall there wasn’t much talk of his homosexuality in the 1970s. All the gossip centred on another notorious bachelor whom everyone ‘knew’ was gay: Prince Charles.

The Spectator, the house journal of you-know-who, reviews James Graham's updated Tory Boyz at the Ambassadors Theatre, London.

That "z" is annoying, isn't it?
Almost as annoying as those three grinning poshos in that photo, though maybe that's the point?

"You blue-rinsed bitch!"

Blurb! In the wake of the deep Conservative divide exposed by the recent vote on gay marriage, National Youth Theatre brings its hit production back to the West End after a sold out run at Soho Theatre in 2008. Tory Boyz is a bold and astute political comedy that takes us behind the scenes of the corridors of power at Westminster where saving face and avoiding scandal is the order of the day.

PS The Torygraph wet their Calvins and gave it five stars!

Tory Pride And Prejudice: Shouldn't "Prejudice" Come First?

This book - with its migraine-inducing cover - is published this week, to coincide with the Conservative Party conference. Obvs.
It's a fascinating subject and very timely, what with the Tories actually doing some good stuff for The Gays for the first time, instead of queuing up to give us all a good collective kicking.
Blood ban, parental registration on passports, gay marriage (possibly), slight change to old "homosexual offences" you can now get removed from your criminal records... the list is quite literally not endless.
And only a cynic would say they're just doing a bit of light dusting after someone else has cleaned the entire fucking house.
So what of Tory Pride And Prejudice - the book?
Don't ask me, I haven't seen a copy.
But as a dedicated gay journalist I'll only read the blurb on the back cover anyway.
"This is the story of how public opinion became steadily more accepting and progressive, and how the Tories caught up at last..."
Says it all, doesn't it?
It's written by a Tory, Michael McManus, who now runs Biteback (!) Publishing (so send me a free copy, bitch).
Here's Fagburn childishly picking holes in a piece he wrote for the Mail On Sunday last month; 'How The Tories Became The Gay-Friendly Party'
And, in the interests of balance, here's McManus talking about his book on Broadcasting House on Sunday.
Mr McManus used to run Ted Heath's office for several years - and ghosted researched and drafted his memoirs.
Which I hope you find as gigglesome as I do.
So let's cut straight to the gossip.
Was the bachelor PM gay?
McManus thinks he definitely was;
“Some people said he was just asexual, but I don’t believe anyone is asexual. They so often looked for other reasons, but to me it was clear. He sacrificed his personal life for his career.”
So now you know.

• Fascinating book fact! The working title for Tory Pride And Prejudice was Over The Blue Rainbow. Presumably until someone pointed out this made no sense.

Things I Learnt Over The Weekend

I've had a cold. Looks like I didn't miss much.

1. The Guardian still can't get enough of John Waters.
Superfreak made his third appearance in The Guardian/Observer in a fortnight.
This week he's explaining What I See In The Mirror.
Answer; the body of a junky and Little Richard's moustache.
I think the thing I like most about John Waters is how he revels in bad behaviour - his own and other peoples' - and he never ever apologises.
Unlike some more stately homos...

2. Elton John is the nation's favourite scratched record.
On Piers Meets Elton, a royal command performance of sorts, Sir Elton of John wibbles on about My Drugs Hell.
Again.
I guess it takes a special kind of talent to make taking shedloads of drugs sound boring.
Forgive him great British public for he has sinned...

3. Channel 4's The House That Made Me is the new mea culpa for "troubled" gay stars.
Boy George was on it this week.
It's Michael Barrymore on Thursday.
Both once much loved working-class lads from that London who've been in a spot of bother and are desperately seeking rehab with the great British public by showing off their roots.
Boy George mused; "I'm basically a gay version of my dad.”
Gor blimey, luvaduck, apples 'n' pears, 'ave a banana!
The one thing they won't talk about is the one thing on everyone's mind; the house that ruined them.
Rachel Cooke reviewed the bad Boy George in the New Statesman; "It's hard to be surprised by anything George-related these days. It's only a couple of years, after all, since the bizarre episode that led to his conviction for falsely imprisoning a male escort. The escort in question, who eventually escaped into the street in his underpants, was Norwegian - a detail that has for some reason stuck in my mind like glue."

4. Matt Lucas isn't a bundle of laughs.
And like Boy George and Barrymore, there is one place we aren't allowed to go.
A prickly Lucas is interviewed inThe Observer Magazine.
His camp straight (comedy) partner, David Walliams, fields most of the questions.
"I make what seems a harmless enough inquiry about Lucas and he fires back that, should I report any details in this article, "I would caution you from a legal perspective right now... that you run the risk of being on the end of a lawsuit."'

5. If you are a grumpy old queen, as Quentin Crisp might have said, then turn being a grumpy old queen into your style.
The Daily Mail wonders; Who'll Save Dun Sulking: Ted Heath's home reveals an unexpected side to Britain's grumpiest PM - so why does it face being sold off?'
Apparently he never married.
"There are photographs of his devoted parents and his brother, John, but no clues as to any lady friend who might have cracked this sturdiest of bachelor hearts..."
This stately (alleged) homo's stately home sounds like the world's grandest confirmed bachelor pad.
"He had no immediate family but that is precisely why his home is such a treasure. Instead of leaving it be carved up by relatives, he left it all in a charitable trust — ranging from gifts from Mao Tse-Tung to the moneybox his father made him as a child."
So if you can't be a national treasure, then leave one to the nation.

Ed Miliband: Living In Sin

The Daily Mail is up in arms again.
Why?
'Ed Miliband becomes first British political leader of a major party to be living with his family out of wedlock.'
Actually even they didn't seem too convinced by this manufactured outrage.
"...the couple’s relaxed stance on marriage stands in contrast to David Cameron and Nick Clegg’s ultra-traditional set-up.
"It also reflects the changing attitude of voters; in past generations, being part of an unmarried couple would have been regarded as electoral suicide. Previous party leaders have either been married or, as with Edward Heath, resolutely single."
Funny Ted Heath never married, eh?
The Daily Mail's constant carping about Ed being unmarried is satirised in the new Private Eye who mocked up a front page; "'WHY WON'T ED GET MARRIED - Is he a poof? House prices plummet as Labour elect new leader.'
In The Times Carl Midgley writes; 'How many hoots could you give that Ed Miliband isn’t married to his long-term partner? I have checked my “bovvered” barometer repeatedly on this matter and never found it to be hovering much above zero. I have polled my friends, too — some married, some not, all over 35, most with children — and the general reaction has been the same. A quote from one of them probably sums it up best: “Nah — don’t give a rat’s rectum. More to worry about in life.”'
Quite.