Somerset: Homophobia

In what is clearly the most egregious case of HOMOPHOBIA in our time, a local councillor in Mad-Gay-Under-Hysteria (N. Somerset), has said he has been a victim of homophobia.
Mr Starrk Raving-Bonkkers, who is 14, said he has been left no choice but to stand down.
'They called me bad names, and then once tried to kill me,' he wrote. 'I was so traumatised I forgot to report it to the police. I also own five unicorns.'
'People keep saying I am a liar, but I am most definitely not!' he tweeted, while being stretchered away.
'I am not one of those people who CRY HOMOPHOBIA when I have fucked up and don't know what else to do.'
Speaking exclusively to Fagburn, cause no-one else picked up the phone, Lynne Robot MP, said; 'This sounds horrible - and I am using 'sounds horrible' to indicate I also think he's made this up.'
North Somerset council were too busy laughing to investigate.