Election 2015: Analysis By Nicky Haslam

What did Ed Miliband’s kitchen say to him, I wonder? “Oh, kitchens are so common, aren’t they? And people who bang on about kitchens are common,” he says dismissively. Bathrooms are much more revealing, he thinks. “Dickie Avedon [the American photographer] once said to me, if you want to decorate for someone properly, you should go to the bathroom and find out what pills they take, if they’re on uppers or downers or what.”

Haslam may be unenthusiastic about Miliband’s kitchen but he loves the man himself. “He looks like a Velázquez. An extraordinary face. He’s really rather beautiful. I met him the other day and I said, ‘You may have read, Mr Miliband, that I think you’re wonderful-looking.’ And he said, ‘Have you met my wife?’” He chuckles throatily. “I thought that was quite funny.” What about David Cameron? “Great fat lump!” he declares. “I’m very fond of David but he looks like anybody really, doesn’t he?”

Interior designer and socialite, Nicky Haslam, The Times.

Lucky readers also learn Nicky keeps his weight down by watching his diet. 

“Avocados only,” he says. “I’m sure that was the food of Eden.”