James Bond: Ho Mo 7

Former James Bond and Professional Heterosexual Pierce Brosnan certainly thinks it’s time, but he admits that there was always resistance about the idea of a gay Bond. In a recent interview, he said: “"Actually, I don't know how it would work. I don't think Barbara [Broccoli, the James Bond producer] would allow a gay Bond to happen in her lifetime. But it would certainly make for

interesting viewing.”

He's largely talking out of his tail-pipe; of course Bond could be gay. He could be blond, vegetarian, he could back Jeremy Corbyn if he really wanted. None of those qualities directly tie into what the films are about - a secret agent fighting a group of slightly racist stereotypes in the name of protecting our beautiful little country.

Bond being gay is fine, in theory. But beneath the surface, there's a clearer subtext to Brosnan's words. It's not that he couldn't be gay, but that many believe he shouldn't. The Great British public, the thinking goes, would reject a gay Bond, and in doing so would destroy a dearly beloved institution and a pillar of masculinity in one fell swoop.

"Who would choose to go and see a gay Bond?" is just a fiddlier version of the argument "who would want to be gay?" The logic is that 'straight' is 'normal' and therefore 'best'. It's the default, it's not offensive. So making Bond gay would be a gamble; throwing away something we know straight audiences love and trying something they might be hostile towards...
Chris Mandle, Daily Telegraph.

Stirling Moss: Some Of My Best Friends Are Poofters

"I hope the actor would be masculine, not a poofter or anything like that. Perhaps the guy from Skyfall?"

Stirling Moss - "veteran driving ace" - on who'd play him in the (non-existent) movie, quoted in the Mail Online.
I don't like to bring age into this, I hope to be old myself one day, but all reports I've seen have stressed Mr Moss is 83.
Is this meant to make it okay?
Or is it a sign of senile dementia?
Stirling was last in the news when he was hospitalised after falling three storeys when he tried to get in a "lift" that wasn't there. 
Rather brilliantly, when contacted by Mail Online, Stirling kept on digging...

"Certainly I've got very many friends who are of the different persuasion; I just wouldn't want to be that way and I'm glad I'm not.
"They are not going to make a film about me in any case but if they did, I think someone who's masculine would be better than someone who's effeminate, because I've spent my whole life chasing crumpet and racing cars.
"That's what I was all about - going around the world and spreading happiness. It wouldn't obviously work if I was played by that lovely chap Kenneth Williams who played upon being poofy.
"I'm sorry I've caused offence, but I didn't mean to cause any. I personally am very grateful to homosexuals because the more of them there are around, the more women are free for me."

Veteran driving comedy GOLD!

PS The Mail now has a dedicated message board thread on this titled... 'Poofter' Row.
It's every bit as glorious as you imagine.

Silly Season: Filler

FEW stars look like “real men” these days when they hit the beach. The hairy chest brigade have been overtaken by a bunch of preening pretty boys. 
Cristiano Ronaldo, Aston Merrygold and the TOWIE mob pack their beach bags with guyliner, moisturiser, teeth whitener and hair straighteners. 
But movie hardmen Hugh Jackman, Daniel Craig and Stephen Dorff don’t bother with plucking, pedicures and waxes before they pack their trunks. 
Here we sort the men from the boys... 
 The Sun.

"Right, if we print the pictures big enough we can probably fill two pages with this nonsense. Pub?"

FYI...
Men! (Grrr!): Daniel Craig, Anthony Kiedis, Stephen Dorff, Mark Wahlberg, Hugh Jackman, Gerard Butler.
Not men: Joey Essex, Mark Wright, Cristiano Ronaldo, Aston Merrygold, Gavin Henson, "Gaz from Geordie Shore".

Although I'm not 100% sure about Aston, they seem to have pointedly only chosen gentlemen of a heterosexual persuasion.