Independent Voices: Keep Your Shirt On

A quite ridiculous article by Howard Jacobson that could perhaps only have appeared in the hysterically prudish and puritanical and anti-sex Independent Voices.

It's so barking and tenuous an 'argument' it's hard to summarise, but essentially he manages to go from the Satanic sight of Zac Efron being briefly shirtless at last week's MTV Movie Awards, straight into - I kid you not - the Cyril Smith child abuse cover-up, and then onto sexism in the UK and - with a certain inevitability - Page 3.

An actual thing The Sun did briefly in the 80s.

To be clear: I am not using the sexualisation of Zac Efron’s body to discredit those who complain about the sexualisation of women’s. On the contrary, I consider the one to be the mirror image of the other. The Page 3 girl pinned on a workshop door degrades all parties to its being there: the inanely objectified girl and those who inanely ogle her. And we should not discount the coarsening effects of inanity itself. To trivialise is also to dishonour. Dumb also degrades. Similarly degraded and inane, anyway, are the girls who shout “phwoar” the minute a boy, a man, a Chippendale, a birthday stripper, undoes a button...

Howard surely missed a trick though by not drawing a wobbly line to the silent epidemic of sexual assault on the gay scene Patrick Strudwick warned us about in The Independent last week. 

Or claimed internet porn has turned us into a nation of bum-sniffing feral dogs.

Or said all sex workers are slaves in service to patriarchy.

Regular sententious Indy Voices clichés both.

What a load of utter erotophobic cock.

And as with so much of the bourgeois lemon-sucking joyless journalism on Independent Voices, next time why not save everyone's time and write just two words; 'Sex? Boo!'

BAN THIS FILTH!!! DOWN WITH FUGLYISM!

Gay Action Hero Movie: Spoiler Alert!

Director Lee Daniels always has an interesting eye for casting (thanks to him, we saw a grownup Zac Efron in The Paperboy). Now it looks like he's tapped Alex Pettyfer (Magic Mike) to be his new muse, saying he will star as one-half of a gay interracial action hero couple in a new feature film project Daniels has in development.

The always ambitious Daniels, who is riding high on the critical acclaim and box office receipts of the Oscar-worthy Lee Daniels' The Butler, has revealed in an exclusive interview with Out magazine, that he's developing an "interracial love affair action movie" with an interracial gay couple. According to Daniels, think of it as a gay "Mr. and Mrs. Smith, but the two good-looking guys as the action heroes." The twist? "We don't find out they're gay until the end of the movie," he explains...

Out magazine.

"In other news, the chick in "The Crying Game" is really a man!" - Mayor Quimby, Los Simpsons.

Fagburn's not terribly sure who this Pettyfer dude is, tbh, but here's a SHIRTLESS photo of him anyway.

PS Please bear in mind not every movie proposal actually becomes a movie...