Fagburn: The Week In Review

I don't care if Paul Weller's son says he's bisexual (even though he's gay as a lorry).
I don't care if a Canadian Olympic silver medal winning skater has come out ('as gay...').
I don't care if Madame JoJo's closed.
I don't care what Sam Smith sings.
I don't care what Prince Harry's secret is.
I don't care if a gay porn star smuggled meth up his 'ass'.
I don't care about Gay Star News' right-wing crap.
I don't care what the Church Of Scotland says about anything.
I don't care about your endless Ukip ranting.
I don't care what American Apparel wants to sell me.
I don't care what lame gayer might get a Grammy.
I don't care about your 'adorable', 'heart-warming' videos.
I don't care about sentimental crap in general.
I don't care if Michael Sam kissed his boyfriend.
I don't care who Michael Sam is.
I don't care if the Warwick Rowers drown.
I don't care about Tom Daley's synchronised swimming.*
I don't care who Robbie Rogers.
I don't care about football full stop.
I don't care if you go on holiday to Uganda.
I don't care if Joan Collins is a dame now.
I don't care about you ignoring Ben Cohen's accounts.
I don't care if Pope Francis likes gay kids.
I don't care who's in the Out 100.
I don't care about Morrissey's hypocrisy.
I don't care about the billionaire Apple fag.
I don't care about Peter Tatchell photo-opps.
I don't care about your advertorial for hair loss.
I don't care about Australia's first gay marriage kiss.
I don't care about your press trip to Tel Aviv.
I don't care if New Zealand's appointed their first 'openly gay' high court judge.
I don't care if gay marriage will boost tourism in Utah.
I don't care about stinking kids baking rainbow cakes.
I don't care about a rainbow anything.
I don't care if Owen Jones tweets his packed lunch.
I don't care about Damian Barr's new writing shed.
I don't care what some public school Smugtwit just said.
I don't care what you think about Putin.
I don't care about the gay media's service to Empire.
I don't care about your NAKED SEX PORN Issue.
I don't care about your 'evolution on gay issues'.
I don't care if a bigot says another thing bigoted.
I don't care about RuPaul's Drag Race Season 7.
I don't care that your intern carn't spel.
I don't care about a made-up survey.
I don't care what press release you got today.
I don't care what crap you read in the Daily Star yesterday.
I don't care just cause someone's gay.
I don't care how much Barclay's pay you.
I don't care about your narcophobia.
I don't care about your racist readers' comments.
I don't care about fucking Looking.
I don't care about Ian McKellen's leching.
I don't care about ProudCamden's cancelled Christmas booking.
I don't care what Benedict Cumberbatch 'thinks' about Alan Turing.
I don't care about your gayist cult of taking offence at nothing.
I don't care about your gay hysteria
And your celebration of all that is banal and brain-destroying.

I LITERALLY DO NOT FUCKING CARE!!!

* This is a LIE!